Love Letter To Normals Sample (Page 2 of 3) in pdf

Fibromyalgics have a different kind of pain that is hard to treat. It is not caused by

inflammation like an injury. It is not a constant ache in one place like a broken bone. It moves

around my body daily and hourly and changes in severity and type. Sometimes it is dull and

sometimes it is cramping or prickly. Sometimes it's jabbing and excruciating. If Eskimos

have a hundred words for snow, fibromyalgics should have a hundred words for pain.

Sometimes I just hurt all over like I've been beaten up or run over by a truck. Sometimes I

feel too tired to lift up my arm.

Besides pain, I have muscle stiffness which is worse in the morning and evenings.

Sometimes when I get up out of a chair I feel like I am ninety years old. I may have to ask

you to help me up. I'm creaky and I'm klutzy. I trip over things no one can see, and I bump

into the person I am walking with and I drop things and spill things because my fingers are

stiff and my coordination is off. I just don't seem to connect the way I should. Hand-eye,

foot-eye coordination, it's all off. I walk slowly up and down stairs because I'm stiff and I'm

afraid I might fall. When there's no railing to hold on to, it's terrifying.

Because I feel bad most of the time, I am always pushing myself, and sometimes I just push

myself too hard. When I do this, I pay the price. Sometimes I can summon the strength to do

something special but I will usually have to rest for a few days afterwards because my body

can only make so much energy. I pay a big price for overdoing it, but sometimes I have to. I

know it's hard for you to understand why I can do one thing and not another. It's important for

you to believe me, and trust me about this. My limitations, like my pain and my other

symptoms are invisible, but they are real.

Another symptom I have is problems with memory and concentration which is called fibro

fog. Short-term memory is the worst! I am constantly looking for things. I have no idea where

I put down my purse, and I walk into rooms and have no idea why. Casualties are my keys

which are always lost, my list of errands, which I write up and leave on the counter when I go

out. Even if I put notes around to remind myself of important things, I'm still liable to forget

them. Don't worry, this is normal for fibromyalgics. Most of us are frightened that we are

getting Alzheimer's. New kinds of brain scans have actually documented differences in our

brains.

I mentioned my sensitivities earlier and I need to talk about them again. It's more like

intolerance to everything. Noise, especially certain noises like the television or shrill noises

can make me jittery and anxious. Smells like fish or some chemicals, or fragrances or

perfume can give me headaches and nausea. I also have a problem with heat and cold. It

sounds like I'm never happy but that isn't it. These things make me physically ill. They stress

me out and make my pain worse and I get exhausted. Sometimes I just need to get away from

something, I just don't know how else to say it. I know sometimes this means I will have to

go outside, or out to the car, or go home to sit alone and that's really all right. I don't want or

need you to give up doing what's important to you. That would only make me feel worse.

Sometimes when I feel lousy I just want to be by myself. When I'm like this there's nothing

you can do to make me feel better, so it's just better to let me be.

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Love Letter To Normals Sample Page 2