Marriage Contract Page 11
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16Marriage Contract
1.
A divorcee who is in her three months’ waiting
the revocable divorce (talaq, a divorce initiated by the
husband.)
It is forbidden (harãm) to propose to her directly or indirectly
before the expiry of her ‘iddah. The divorced couple, in this
case, may decide to revoke their divorce during the grace
period.
2.
A divorcee who is in her three months’ waiting period (‘iddah) of
the irrevocable divorce (khula‘, a divorce initiated by the wife.)
It is forbidden (harãm) to propose to her directly but one is
allowed to propose to her indirectly.
3.
A widow who is in her four months’ waiting period (‘iddah) after
her husband’s death.
It is forbidden (harãm) to propose to her directly but he is
allowed to propose to her indirectly. (See the Qur’an 2:235)
4.
An engaged woman: Is it permissible for man to propose a lady
who is already engaged? Among the past scholars, there are
two views on this issue: from makruh (irreprehensible) to harãm
(forbidden). However, if a woman who has just received a
proposal but has not yet responded to it positively, it is
permissible to propose her. In this case, if a man proposes to
an engaged woman and eventually marries her, then according
to those who consider that proposal to be haram, although the
act of proposing is sinful but the actual marriage between the
two would still be valid.
Engagement Ceremony
There is no such thing as an engagement ceremony in Islam. “Engagement”
is just a nonbinding agreement to marry. However, Muslims have adopted
certain traditions from other cultures or made their own customs. Technically,
if traditions don’t violate the shari‘ah laws, then there is no problem. For
example , among the Shi‘as of north India, the man’s family go with an “Imam
zãmin” to the girl’s family and tie it on her arm as a well-wish gesture for the
girl – this is done by the women of the man’s family.
These days, many Muslim cultures have adopted the Western tradition of
giving or exchanging engagement rings. Apparently, this was first done by
Maximilian I, the Holy Roman Emperor , in 1477 when he gave a diamond
ring to Mary of Burgundy. However, there is a problem in this tradition: since
the engagement does not make the man and the woman mahram to one
another, they cannot touch one another even for giving the engagement ring,
they still have to observe the rules of hijab. The only solution is to recite the
temporary nikah for the purpose of becoming mahram only. For more details,
see my Marriage & Morals in Islam.
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