Marriage Preparation Work Book Ii - Love Map Questionnaire Template Page 31
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38(3)
Hopefully an honest look at these questions help you to realize that your perspective on an argument
may be different from that of your partner. It is natural to make the fundamental error of believing that the
fight is your partner’s fault. To break the pattern, you both need to admit, some role (however slight at first)
in creating the conflict. Circle the following statements that apply and the degree to which the statement
does.
1.
I have been very stressed and irritable lately.
Yes, Definitely
Maybe a Little
2.
I have not expressed much appreciation toward
my partner lately
Yes, Definitely
Maybe a Little
3.
I have been overly sensitive lately
Yes, Definitely
Maybe a Little
4.
I have been overly critical lately
Yes, Definitely
Maybe a Little
5.
I have not shared very much of my inner world.
Yes, Definitely
Maybe a Little
6.
I have been depressed lately
Yes, Definitely
Maybe a Little
7.
I would say that I have a chip on my shoulder
Yes, Definitely
Maybe a Little
8.
I have not been very affectionate.
Yes, Definitely
Maybe a Little
9.
I have not been a very good listener lately
Yes, Definitely
Maybe a Little
10.
I have been feeling a bit like a martyr.
Yes, Definitely
Maybe a Little
(4)
Answer the following questions.
1.
Overall my contribution to this mess was:
2.
How can I make this better in the future?
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Gottman, John and Nan Silver: The Seven Principles For Making Marriage Work: A Practical Guide
From the Country’s Foremost Relationship Expert (New York: Three Rivers Press, 1999).
50
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