How To Think More Assertively Worksheet Template Page 6
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15--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ASSERT YOURSELF!
In the following example the person ignored a phone call from her friend and felt tense and
sick whenever she thought about the situation.
Next you need to identify your thoughts in the situation. These thoughts can take the
forms of assumptions, interpretations, beliefs, values and so on. Sometimes they could even
take the form of images or pictures rather than words. Ask yourself:
What was I thinking?
What was running through my head?
In the example the person’s thoughts were:
I said ‘yes’ to go shopping with her when I didn’t want to.
So she should have said ‘yes’ to me
Saying ‘No’ is rude, uncaring and selfish.
Maybe she doesn’t like me any more.
You then need to rate the strength of your beliefs in these thoughts at the time. A
rating of 0 means you didn’t believe them at all and a rating of 100 means you believed them
100%. Once you have completed this first part of the Thought Diary you move onto the
disputation. The questions you ask yourself in the disputation are:
Am I thinking in a passive, assertive or aggressive way?
Did I respond in a passive, assertive or aggressive way?
What is the evidence for this thought?
What is the evidence against this thought?
Am I ignoring my rights or the rights of my friends?
How else could I view the situation?
Are there any other interpretations of what happened?
The idea behind asking yourself these questions is to come up with a more balanced
and assertive way of thinking and behaving. You ask yourself:
What would be a more assertive way of thinking and responding?
The final step is to re-rate the intensity of the original emotion and strength of the
belief. If you have worked through the entire thought diary it is likely that you will
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Module 3 How to Think More Assertively
Page 6
nterventions
• Psychotherapy • Research • Training
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