How To Think More Assertively Worksheet Template Page 7
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15--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ASSERT YOURSELF!
experience a decrease in the intensity of the emotion and a decrease in the degree to which
you believe your initial unhelpful thought. If you continue to practice this way of thinking
you can find that you begin thinking and behaving in a more assertive manner.
Thought Diary: Part 1 Understanding your reaction.
Situation:
I asked a friend to go shopping with me and she said “no”.
What emotions was I feeling? How
Hurt
70
strong were these? Rate (0-100)
Angry
80
What physical response did I
Tense, tight chest, clenched jaw. Felt sick when I thought
notice in my body?
about her.
What did I do?
Cried, then ignored the next phone call I had from her.
Was this a passive, assertive or
Passive-aggressive
aggressive way of behaving?
What thoughts were running
I said ‘yes’ to go shopping with her when I didn’t want to.
through my head?
So she should have said ‘yes’ to me
She is selfish to say “no”.
Maybe she doesn’t like me anymore.
Which is the strongest thought?
She is selfish for saying “No”.
How much do I believe this
80
thought?
Are these passive, assertive or
Passive because I thought I should do something I didn’t want
aggressive thoughts?
to do.
Aggressive that I think she should do what I want her to.
Part 2: Disputing or challenging your unassertive thoughts
Is there any evidence that my
None
thought is true?
Is there any evidence that my
She has done lots of things with me and for me over the course of our
thought is not true?
friendship.
Am I ignoring my rights or the
Yes, I ignored my rights by saying “yes” when I didn’t want to go
rights of the other person? If so,
shopping.
what am I ignoring?
And I am ignoring her rights by acting as if she has to do what I want.
The right I am ignoring is “everyone has the right to say “no”.”
Are there any other ways of
She may be tired
interpreting the situation?
She may not want to go shopping
She may have something else on
I’m mind-reading what she is thinking.
I’ve said no to her sometimes and that didn’t mean that I didn’t like her.
What would be a more assertive
She has a right to say no and that doesn’t mean she is selfish. Nor does it
way to think about this?
say anything about what she may or may not think about me.
What would be a more assertive
I will suggest catching up another time doing something that we both
way to behave?
like.
Rerate my original emotion:
Hurt 20
Rerate my belief in the original
Angry 10
thought:
Belief: 10
C
entre for
C I
linical
Module 3 How to Think More Assertively
Page 7
nterventions
• Psychotherapy • Research • Training
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